Today, 5th May 2013 was Malaysia's 13th General Election.
For the first time ever, I started noting and actually caring about the politics back home.
Before this, I always thought that it had nothing to do with me. That it is something to far away that my one vote doesn't matter. And there's that issue of accountability as well. Everyone else around me wasn't talking about politics. To us, nothing else mattered other than school, who's dating who and all the other trivial teenage issues. Back then, the biggest politics to me was office-politics in school. That was about it.
Maybe it was because of my young age then?
Maybe its because I'm finally of voting age now and is therefore more relevant to me?
Maybe its cause of the circulating stories and issues on the social media?
Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. But that isn't the point now.
Facebook and Twitter was bombarded with news of the election. Even Whatsapp messages from the family back home were filled with election-related stuff. At first I was still rather nonchalant about it all. Then, things started to pick up. Then I noticed actual, deep-rooted problems that the government must answer to. Things indicating that a change is needed.
Unfortunately, there is alot of party-sided rage and emotional rants everywhere. Some took this election too far. I guess you can blame both parties for starting the spark of trouble, playing with the emotions of people. But it is still the people who fall for it. I fail to see rational, clear-minded rallying - only in a few small cluster of people. To mention a few better ones which were less hot-headed, this note and this video.
Another thing to note: This anger and rioting I see in the streets of Malaysia over this election - makes me wonder if any party actually wanted them to happen? BN as to scare people not to vote for the opposition by saying chaos would ensue? Or the opposition using them as prove of BN's cowardice and lies?
What stood out were the cries for change. "Ubah" and "Ini kalilah".
So ambiguous. Do people really cry out for a change in governance, in a change for a better future for the country? Or are they shouting these words in hopes of overthrowing the current ruling party, in hopes of teaching them a lesson for monopolising the country since independence? One may not notice a difference. But there is.
Today, I woke up expecting to know the results (due to the time difference). But votes were still being counted and I was hooked onto websites, trying to get live information as soon as possible. Clicking the refresh button every once in a while. As expected, there were the fraud accusations. Fading indelible ink, 'importing' foreign voters, ballot boxes appearing at midnight, the infamous power outage and recounts. How much of it is true? How much is just the opposition's struggle for power?
At the end of the day, BN remained victorious. I must admit, I had hopes for a different outcome. To see if the other side can do better, to give them a chance. But, that won't be happening this time.
Disappointment drowned everyone I know. Again, Facebook and Twitter were full of it. Rants, accusations and swearing even. Then came the profile picture blackouts. Some changed it to signal their disappointment in the so-called 'democracy' of Malaysia. Some showing disappointment of the election outcome. Some just to prove they are taking part in the election-fever, not wanting to miss out.
Me? I changed it in mourning. Mourning for a loss of what I hoped for. Mourning for what it could have been.
Then, came the writings. The expressions of the bright-minds of Malaysia. Here they are.
And here, a few sentences I particularly liked.
Sweeping overnight change within a nation of 28 million is simply unrealistic. If one pauses to consider the numbers, the changes taking place in Malaysia cannot even be described as marginal or incremental -these are significant jumps. They are real and that shouldn't be overlooked in favor of 'winning' outright.
The rakyat is unhappy with the direction that the country is headed towards and want passionately for change to take place. But how has democracy died tonight? Surely the fact that we can this much is the very fact that demonstrates that democracy is well and alive in Malaysia.
Black with the promise of a better tomorrow.
Never, never, forget this: Barisan may have formed the government but we are still the people. Malaysia is still bloody us, not Barisan, not Pakatan. Us.
This is not the time to be pessimistic. Instead, I'm grateful.
Grateful for this insight into my country's problems, worries and future.
Wanting the government to realise the power the people have, and the need for a deep reform.
Also, today led me to realise how much I really do love my country. My international friends here asks, "Why don't you just leave the country already?" "Just migrate."
I must say, I am not prepared to give up on it. It is my home and I cannot imagine not being able to call it so. Government, politics aside, it is where I grew up, where my memories are, the place who made me who I am today.
There is still hope. I love my country and I will be prepared to fight for her in future.
Malaysia,
Negaraku,
Tanah tumpahnya darahku.
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